|
waiting for the fluff - 2000-11-09
So, a Fluffernutter and a Diet Coke in my stomach... I don't know how terrible I'm feeling. My eyes are baked with Pearl Jam song titles, and my back feels like a Jenga tower on the verge of toppling, I really need to replace my stool with a chair. I wrote a midterm tonight, one which I neatly smeared bull shit in between the lines of a Laurier exam booklet. That was not my concern, or the most exciting moment of my day. It was a midterm for crying out loud... I need to stop talking about my homework online. But today was a lovely day. It was overcast, yes, but it was mild and misty... The kind of day that makes me long to be a lighthouse keeper. The fact that we are studying the middle ages in history has reignited my passion for that era. I always wanted to be a pirate, or a brigand, whatever that tells you. I suppose back then I wouldn't have had a conscience, so maybe I could have been an assassin, or something... The sun was out, but it was covered up by this haze... It was enough for me to faintly see my shadow when I was out for a cigarette. Enough for me to wear my sunglasses (which I would wear at night, if it weren't considered vampiric). The stars were non existant, but the overcast remained, and the night sky was a a smoky, warming grey... Much lighter than it ever should be. It makes sense, too... There were no stars. I understand, because there is no shine in my mind right now. I am totally devoid of anything creative, anything inspired. I am at a totalt loss for anything interesting to write about. So I've become determined. First, I've become determined to search into my past and find the most inspiring person of place in my history... Then I have to stop relying on that, and sit under a ping pong table in the dark until I come up with an idea that will win me awards and an agent. I am confident with the amount of excitement in my future, something good is bound to happen, and I have yet to actually been motivated by something good, with anything of note coming out of it. Coming soon: y2k's poem about daisies and popsicles. I'm not serious. But I'm devoid, down yet not out. Waiting for the miracle that will make me giddy with ideas again.
archives - diaryland - sodas rule! - ratpony - kam-i-am
|
