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too much foolishness - 2000-11-25
There's something about this room, and the way it feels after I drop off Kim at her house, and return here, nine times out of ten on top of the world and giddy in love. It feels so.... full of emotion, like the room itself is grinning, and would be doing some sort of dance, if only it could move. Don't get me wrong, I still don't like this room. But at certain moments I come home glowing, it glows with me, and plays some nice music to boot. I am looking forward to getting the hell out, though. I am guessing that once I do, I won't ever come back. I see myself deciding to stay in Waterloo for the summer, and then migrate to London in the fall... Everything seems like an inconvenience here, and I am haunted by memories that aren't necessarily scary, but to recent to be ghosts... I have to get away, I do. The town is dead. I am alone here. There is nobody who lives in this town that I see. So, soon I will be moving out, and it just seems like that may be the solution for everything. I like the easy exit, the quick fix. But I don't know how term two will go. I don't like my schedule, and one or two of my classes seem like a mistake. I will learn a lot, and have fun though, and that is what I need right now. I am dead here. No fun. No learning. The stars were out tonight, and the sky tries real hard. But I'm sorry, I have seen better at Bristow Creek, back when I used to come home here, and write Kim an 8k e-mail every night. Or make mixed tapes... Play Final Fantasy 8. Oh, and shit, I am reminiscing. Bad! My point is that if I stay here, I will lose my ability to reminisce about August and everything after. The scenery has been played... Let's destroy it like the sets from 2001! Time for bed. Too much foolishness.
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